


Far From Me

by Glass_Oceans



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Depression, Established Relationship, Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-17
Updated: 2016-12-17
Packaged: 2018-09-09 05:12:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,236
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8877325
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Glass_Oceans/pseuds/Glass_Oceans
Summary: Kylo offers Hux the words he needs to hear.





	

Kylo kicked the complex door behind him, and stood, allowing the worst of the water clinging to his clothes to gather in a grimy puddle at his feet. Better the entry hall take the damage than tracking the melting sleet into the apartment. He allowed himself a long sigh before adjusting his grip on the grocery bags and begins climbing the stairs. 

He was already tired, and sure he’d hear from his shoulders tomorrow about the excess groceries, but he appreciated having the additional few moments to himself. Hux had become increasingly waspish as the week went on, snapping and him and becoming irritated by the smallest things. His temper had never been especially long. But Kylo was unsure about the reception he’d receive when he arrived home. 

The apartment was both quiet and gloomy, and Kylo flicked on the lights as he moved through it, trying to fend off the closing of the day. The kitchen table was a mess of Hux’s tools, the laptop still sitting open and as Kylo put the groceries down on a free corner, he held the knuckles of one hand close to the soldering iron. Cold. And unplugged. Well, that was something at least. The apartment remained quiet but for the rustling of plastic bags as Kylo sorted through the items; fresh basil tagliatelle, crusty Vienna loaf, strawberry ice-cream, simple foods, but some of Hux’s favourites. Part of Kylo hoped he’d see Hux standing watching him as he closed the fridge door, but he already knew where he’d be found. Kylo shrugged off his coat, leaving it to drip on the back of one of the kitchen chairs, and moved towards their bedroom. 

Kylo feels his chest constrict at the sight that meets him there. Hux lies on the bed with his back to the door, curled up tightly on himself. Kylo could tell from the tension of his shoulders that he was awake, had likely heard Kylo moving through the apartment while he lay there. Kylo exhaled softly to ease the tightness in his chest and bent to unlace his boots. Leaving them standing beside the door, he crosses to the bed and folds himself easily into place behind Hux. One hand curls around the redhead's chest, maneuvering itself under his clenched arms to lie flat on his sternum, while the other he folds under his own head so he can reach and stroke gently at the soft red hair. He presses a single soft kiss at the point where his neck meets his shoulder, then pulled back so his still dripping hair wouldn’t chill him. Thus settled, one hard barely moving along Hux’s scalp, he waited. 

Twice he observed Hux’s jaw move, but no sound came forth. The second attempt was accompanied by tears slipping silently from the corners of his eyes. For those Kylo briefly dislodged the hand on Hux’s chest to sweep them away with his thumb, before returning his hand to it’s place over Hux’s chest, moving this thumb in lazy sweeps back and forth over his shirt. The third attempt was so quiet that Kylo might have missed it if he hadn’t been waiting. 

“I can’t do this”

Kylo remains silent, continues stroking Hux’s hair. 

“I can’t… I can’t do this... everything is just… everything is too hard” he rasped. 

“I know, love, I know” Kylo whispered, pulling him closer. 

He watches as Hux’s face crumples and tears began to fall freely from his clenched eyes. His legs twitch as he tries to draw them tighter, and Kylo simply holds him, wiping away the tears, whispering “I know”, until the tears are spent and he lies calm and limp in Kylo’s embrace. The night has closed in fully by now, and the only light in the room is what spills from the living room through the bedroom door. It’s enough for Kylo to distinguish Hux’s slow blinks as he stares at the wall. Kylo presses a kiss, then a second to the freckles on his cheek, pressing his palm to Hux’s chest as if he could will away the ache he knows is there. 

“Are you hungry?” he ventures. 

Hux seems to give this question a weight beyond it’s due and the answer is long in coming. 

“No.”

“Will you eat something if it's put in front of you?”

This question doesn’t get an answer, but he can see Hux’s jaw move as he fights with himself. 

“C’mon”

Kylo shuffles towards the edge of the bed, pulling Hux after him. He coaxes Hux into sitting up by means of gentle hounding, almost inducing the shadow of a smile from him… but even as the smirk fades, he can see his eyes begin to glisten. Kylo pulls him up and wraps his arms around him, allowing Hux to hide his face against his shoulder. When Kylo feels his breathing calm, he moves his lips to Hux’s ear to whisper:

“Keep me company in the kitchen?”

Kylo feels the nod against his shoulder and eases back, lifting his hands to smooth this thumbs Hux’s cheeks, kissing him gently. Hux allows himself to be led from the bedroom, coming to a halt when he observes the attempt Kylo’s jacket is making on creating their own indoor pool. 

“Glad to see I’m not the only one making a mess.”

“You know the rules”, Kylo quips, “lakes in the home only get commented on if your socks become a casualty.”

“I’m not wearing socks” Hux mutters. 

Kylo leans in to place a kiss on the tip of Hux’s nose before darting out of swatting range. 

“Then no complaining!”.

Kylo turns his attention to the stove, watching Hux from the corner of his eye. For a long moment he simply stands there, absentmindedly brushing his fingers over the pliers and frayed wire ends on the table. With a sudden burst of motion, he begins to gather them up from the table, sweeping them roughly into a waiting container, and Kylo feels himself release a breath he hadn’t realised he’d been holding. 

With the table somewhat clearer, Hux flops down into one of the chairs, staring at nothing, but summoning the ghost of a smile when Kylo looks over to him. Leaving the pasta to simmer, Kylo takes the chair beside him, and folds his still cold hands within his own. Hux won’t look up at him this time, and he can almost see the usual questions lining up in his mind. 

“Because I love you”

Watery blue eyes slowly lift to meet his. 

“Because when you’re not well, I take care of you. Just like you do for me.”

Hux’s lips thin as he presses them together, fighting back against fresh tears. Kylo lets him pull back one hand to swipe aggressively at his eyes, holding one hand open and waiting until Hux lets it rest there again. 

“Because the bad days don’t last forever, and I’ll remind you of that as often as you need to hear it.”

Kylo strokes his thumb over the knuckles of Hux’s hand, watching as his eyes close and his breathing deepens. 

“I love you”

Kylo smiles, leaning close to press his lips to Hux’s. 

“I love you too.”

Without leaning back, he raises a hand to Hux’s chin, brushing his fingers gently there, but waiting until Hux raises his own head, his blue eyes so beautiful, so clear. 

“You can do this.”

**Author's Note:**

> This was created for [smol-hux's December prompts](http://smol-hux.tumblr.com/post/153102752890/december-prompts-here-are-some-non-holiday) \- Day 17: Sick. 
> 
> I'm on tumblr [here, come say hi!](http://glass-oceans.tumblr.com/)


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